A Magnolia's Heart Beats

Friday Funnies is hosted each week by Kim at Homesteaders Heart. Please be sure to stop by her blog, link up, and post your own Friday Funny! Here are a few that made me laugh out loud...

Severe Thunderstorm

A passenger jet was suffering through a severe thunderstorm. As the passengers were being bounced around by the turbulence, a six year old boy turned to a minister sitting next to him and asked, "Preacher, you're a man of God, can't you do something about this storm?" To which he replied, "Son, I'm in sales, not management."

Magnetic Letters

A kindergartner was practicing spelling with magnetic letters on the refrigerator: CAT, DOG, DAD, and MOM have been proudly displayed for all to see. One morning while getting ready for the day, he bounded into the room with his arms outstretched. In his hands were three magnetic letters: G-O-D. "Look what I spelled, Mom!" with a proud smile on his face. "That's wonderful!" his mom praised him. "Now go put them on the fridge so Dad can see when he gets home tonight." The mom happily thought that the Christian upbringing is certainly having an impact. Just then, a little voice called from the kitchen. "Mom? How do you spell ZILLA?"

Good Manners

"Grandpa, I'm really proud of you," said the little Johnny.

"What's to be proud of?" asked the old man.

Little Johnny replied, "I noticed that when you sneeze, you put your hand in front of your mouth."

"Of course," explained Grandpa. "How else can I catch my teeth???"

Missing Homework

"Johnny, where's your homework?" Miss Smith said sternly to the little boy while holding out her hand.

"My dog ate it," was his solemn response.

"Johnny, I've been a teacher for eighteen years. Do you really expect me to believe that?"

"It's true, Miss Smith, I promise," insisted the boy. "I had to force him, but he ate it!"

Last Election Joke

Not Republican or Democrat - Since the presidential campaign is over, I figured some political humor might be in store. The following is a supposedly funny and true story shared with a friend by one KC Williams who teaches High School Government. In one of KC's classes, they were discussing the qualifications to be president of the United States. It was pretty simple. The candidate must be a natural born citizen of at least 35 years of age. However, one girl in the class immediately started in on how unfair was the requirement to be a natural born citizen. In short, her opinion was this requirement prevented many capable individuals from becoming president. KC and the class were just taking it in and letting her rant, but everyone's jaw hit the floor when she wrapped up her argument by stating .. "What makes a natural born citizen any more qualified to lead this country than one born by c-section".

And someday she'll vote!

Happy Friday, ya'll!

"A cheerful disposition is good for your health; gloom and doom leave you bone-tired." ~ Proverbs 17:22 (MSG)