In Pursuit of Proverbs 31 Bible Study Part 6 - Being A Mother
1. Children are a gift from the Lord.
Children truly are a gift from the Lord. Whether we receive them biologically or as a bonus, as was the case when I married, they come as a bonus with your husband. Kristyn became an even greater gift to me when we tried to have children and the Lord said "Wait, then yes, but not on earth." I went through a period of infertility, became pregnant during this time and our angel was born into Heaven rather than earth. After another period of infertility, and an intense time of prayer, God opened the eyes of my heart and let me see the gift before my very eyes. The one I had mothered as though she were my own became the ultimate gift to me. She was all I had, and I can honestly say that I did my best with her. She's 24 now and is married. Now I have grandchildren. And a host of nieces and nephews and cousins who make me very happy!
Amy has given some good guidance on connecting with our children:
1. Establish a day of the week for family night.
2. Read a book together.
3. Go outside with them and actually play with them. Don't just watch them.
4. Ask your child what he/she thinks of things. Find out what they are thinking.
5. Start and hold to some family traditions.
6. Eat a meal together at the table - without the television on.
7. Take your children to places that hold great memories for you and explain it to them.
2. We must parent on purpose
Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it. - Proverbs 22:6
Kristyn grew up in a multi-denominational enviornment. Both denominations are Christian, and we agreed not to interfere with each other's teaching, as long as it was biblically sound. Kristyn's mother began to get her on a regular basis when she was 8 or 9 years old. They went to church on Saturday and observed that day as their Sabbath. When Kristyn was at home, she had no chores to do that day because I knew she wouldn't at her mom's. Tabitha treated her the same way on Sunday's. She didn't make her do any chores on Sunday, because she knew it was the day we observed our Sabbath. While we had no dietary restrictions at our home, we did not insist that Tabitha feed Kristyn things that were "against" their religion while she was over there. We worked well together in training her in Christ, and did not quarrel over minor differences.
- Children are a gift from the Lord.
- We must parent on purpose.
- We must educate our children. It is our responsibility.
Scripture for Memory:
The righteous who walks in his integrity—blessed are his children after him!—Proverbs 20:7
Write It Down (or post it):
Be sure to record your revelation and thoughts in your bible, notebook, or let us all share in what you are learning and write a post about it and link it here!
Done - see above.
Share with us what God has revealed to you when were seeking Him.
I sought God so intimately for an 8 year period regarding one matter, and as I began to pray, He laid more on my heart than I could have ever imagined. God has revealed Himself to me through His Word in so many ways. As I have sought Him, He has reminded me:
In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps.
~ Proverbs 16:9 (NIV)
Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails. ~ Proverbs 19:21 (NIV)
His plans have been far richer for me than I could ever have imagined. I really limited myself in praying for "just one child, Lord. Just one!" He has given me a bonus daughter, a son-in-law, 2 grandchildren and 7 nieces and nephews, and several precious cousins.
"Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think." ~ Ephesians 3:20
For Study Purposes:
Study the word "train" in the bible. Use a concordance. Record your findings.
From www.blueletterbible.org -
The Hebrew word for train is used 3 times in the KJV and has two meanings.
The word used in Proverbs 22:6 is chanak. It means: 1) to train, dedicate, inaugurate a) (Qal) 1) to train, train up 2) to dedicate.
I think this definitely speaks to how we raise our children.
The other Hebrew word for train is shuwl, which means, 1) skirt (of robe)
a) of high priest's robe b) of God's train, city as woman, ignominy, defilement (fig)
The garment that covers each of us as mother's should be our husbands and God!
Sit down with your spouse and discuss your current parenting techniques. What can be changed? What worked well with you concerning your own parents and what didn't?
With Kristyn being 24, this is not something we could do, but we have discussed grandparenting techniques already! As for what worked well concerning our own parents.....I came from a highly dysfunctional home so I was ready to adapt to his chosen method of child-rearing. Anything sounded good to me. I'll be like Forrest Gump and say, "That's all I've got to say about that."
Ask God to speak to you about how you should be training your children. What have you heard from Him? How do you intend to train them in that way?
I did so much praying regarding Kristyn. Once I felt led from God to pray for her her entire fourth grade year. I never missed a day, and she never had a problem. I don't know what my prayers prevented, but I trust Him. I have asked Him for wisdom and guidance in training her many times in the past, because I was not a Momma. I was 20 years old and the sudden bonus mom of a 6 year old. I made a few mistakes along the way, but I trust that God worked it all out for his own good.
Questions to ponder: Have you been connecting with your children? How can you improve upon what you have been doing? Are your discipline techniques working? What can you do differently?
Everything is perfect in that department. I can say that because she's grown and gone. Our nest is empty now. Seriously, we connected well and established a bond that proved to be permanent, though it was tested during her late teenage years. All is well now and I am so happy that even though I was not perfect, God's grace stepped in where my lack of skill and wisdom was simply not there.